for @citer

[cashewlater]

Comments

[citer]

[ tighnari's ear flicks. he looks up. ]

Jealous? [ ... ] Of me?

[cashewlater]

Of them. I..

[ he keeps his gaze down, on their hands. ]

You seemed so happy, with them. You were radiant. I suppose I was worried that my company would never be good enough, that I couldn't compare.

[ he may be intelligent, and an akademiya graduate, but his field is very different from what tighnari is interested in. inadequacy is not a color he wore with grace. ]

[citer]

[ tighnari's silent as he considers this. the premise seems so patently absurd that he needs a moment to think, to process, and to rewind. it had been two hours. he had enjoyed it. and by the end, he had been ready to go home. ]

Compare to what, exactly? The men and women there would have sold me to Natlan royalty if they had thirty seconds to spare. And unless you suddenly developed an interest in the breeding and migration behaviours of Sumeran butterflies, you would have been bored stiff in that conversation.

I was happy, yes, but it was a different kind of happiness than when I am in your presence.

[cashewlater]

[ it absolutely is absurd, which is why cyno feels foolish even saying the words aloud, but insecurities do not always make sense; in fact, they are irrational more often than not. ]

That I couldn't compare to them. That you would rather spend your time among like minds, than you would with me.

[ cyno sighs, as he finishes, tying the silk bandage off in a neat knot. ]

Foolish, I know, but that's simply how I felt at the time. I should be happy that you were happy.

[citer]

[ cyno finishes dressing tighnari's wound. he flexes his hand experimentally, and finds that he still has the full range of use for his fingers - just a little stiff, but it feels better than it had all the ride here. tighnari dips his head in thanks, and considers this. ]

I don't see why you need to be. [ he says, at last. ] Being my friend doesn't mean you need to be happy whenever I am happy, or so I understand from the definition of friendship. Furthermore - that's an unrealistic burden to put on your shoulders. You should be allowed to be happy whenever you want to be, and annoyed whenever you want to be.

Just as I have the right to be annoyed at your annoyance.

[cashewlater]

[ cyno huffs through his nose. ]

I suppose so. I don't know that I entirely agree, but that is my right as well. [ a beat. ] How is the bandage?

[citer]

It's good. It'll hold. [ tighnari breathes out. ] But I won't be able to hold a bow until it heals, and perhaps I am not nearly as good with a knife as I need to be.

[cashewlater]

[ cyno nods, reaching for two packets of rations from the little table beside them. one is offered to tighnari. ]

You were good enough to take down an assailant, but there's always room for improvement. We'll continue your training. If we hit another ambush, I'll cover you, but with any luck we'll get to Caravan Ribat swiftly.

[citer]

[ in exchange, tighnari hands cyno three fresh zaytun peaches he'd found in one of the jars. as dinners go, it's kind of a nice one, he thinks, as he breaks into the rations with a thoughtful hum. ]

And it's into the desert from there, right? Where?

[cashewlater]

Yes.

[ cyno hardly realizes how hungry he was, until he bites into that sweet, fresh peach. he hums. ]

Aaru Village. It's not far beyond the wall, but I doubt Azar will pursue us past it. We'll be able to rest, and formulate.

[citer]

[ it occurs to tighnari that he may, for the first time, see a sandstorm. the thought is fascinating, if a little naive. ]

Do you have any tips for a first-time desert-goer?

[cashewlater]

[ a bite of dried jerky, cyno chews thoughtfully. ]

Protecting your skin is paramount, we'll get you a good light cloak. The days are searing hot, but the nights are quite cold. Below freezing, at times. The sand is grating, and difficult to walk in, so you'll need light footwear.

[citer]

Ah, I'm being dressed again. It sounds far more practical than all this. [ he waves a hand over his torn silks.

he begins to unclip his earrings. one by one, a little gleaming pile grows. ] The gala did provide us with movable wealth, though. I'm looking forward to unloading all of these trinkets.

[cashewlater]

Mm, we should be able to get our hands on better clothing in Caravan Ribat.

[ they've got a good little pile of valuables indeed, between the two of them. cyno, too, has plenty of gold on his person, and weaved through his long hair. his fine silks could fetch a decent price, as well. cyno polishes off another peach. ]

I'm admittedly not very good at haggling..

[citer]

Oh? I've never tried it myself.

[ but tighnari looks intrigued. his tail flickers, its tuft of a tip brushing the side of cyno's leg. ] But if you provide me with the market value of these, I'll see to it that we get a price close to it. I've been told that I'm good at getting into arguments.

[cashewlater]

[ of course he looks intrigued. cyno chuckles, low under his breath. with his rations finished off, cyno takes a long drink from his waterskin. ]

Oh yes, I think you'd be quite excellent at it, if you'd like to try your hand. Those merchants won't know what hit them.

[citer]

You sounds as if I'd clobber them over the head. I'd at least give them a sporting chance to duck.

[cashewlater]

I'm only saying, I would rather not be the merchant on the other end of your tongue.

[citer]

I'd call you a coward, but I think I've taught you better than that. [ a pleased smile. ]

Alright, finish up your food. We have a long way tomorrow. Help me in the morning to collect some fruits and fill up a jar with water - we can take some with us, but I also want to repay the Aranara for their help tonight.

[cashewlater]

I simply know when I've met my match.

[ cyno nods, and begins clearing up their ration packets and peach pits. the pits can be discarded in the forest, the fabric wraps re-used. ]

You'd make an excellent matra, you know.

[citer]

Me?

[ as tighnari begins to set out their sleeping area - extra leaves as bedding, a small woven blanket to be taken down from where it currently hangs on the wall. ]

Hah. I wouldn't know what to do with all that authority. Do you like it? Being a matra.

[cashewlater]

Do I like it?

[ that's.. a surprisingly good question, one that cyno isn't sure how to answer immediately. he stands, tossing the peach pits out of the door and into the wilds, before he's folding the ration wraps into neat squares and setting them aside. they'll go into the saddlebags tomorrow. after that, he's finally shrugging off his cloak, and beginning to divest himself of his own baubles, setting them on the table one by one. ]

I don't think it is about liking it or not liking it. I feel that I must do it, and so I do.

[citer]

[ it is, all in all, tighnari thinks - a very cyno answer. it seems like cyno has always been like this. perhaps some things are beyond liking or dislike. perhaps it's about purpose, and your fundamental understanding of right and wrong, justice and injustice. perhaps that first day on the balcony had illuminated something about cyno's character after all. the stubborn set of his shoulders, the titian sunset of his eyes, justice made into the form of a man.

that justice knew to return the peach pits out into the wild and to recycle fabric is an added bonus that tighnari hadn't expected. but cyno has always been like this, too. ]

You know what your purpose is. Many people don't; that solid understanding of yourself is enviable. I've always thought this, but you are more like bedrock than sand. Sand slips through your fingers, but bedrock can always be counted on to stay steady beneath your feet.

[cashewlater]

[ cyno huffs a soft sound like a laugh. bedrock.. there are plenty more unflattering comparisons to be made, and though cyno hardly knows what to do with compliments, he's nevertheless glad that tighnari sees him so favorably. ]

Until the earth quakes beneath your feet, I suppose.

[ there's a joke to be made about rocking, but cyno does not find himself in a joking mood. removing the last of his baubles, cyno sets his helm aside, and ties his hair back in a thick tail. ]

If I am bedrock, I suppose that you are water. Calm and nurturing, brimming with life, but if you aren't careful, you'll drown yourself in it. You could erode even the toughest bedrock.

[citer]

Oh? [ tighnari's ears perk. ] Do you find yourself eroded, General Mahamatra?