for @citer

[cashewlater]

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[cashewlater]

[ cyno's brows lift high, his muted annoyance all at once converging into shock. ]

A cage?

[ something rushes in cyno's breast, a prickling heat, and though his expressions are often stoic, it is clear that that word is a barb to him. he's wounded. ]

I give you every freedom, Tighnari. You can come and go as you please, you could come to the city any time to speak with scholars and doctors, tonight you said - you said you would not leave me to suffer alone. Is it a cage to expect you to have honored your word?

[citer]

[ it clicks: the surliness, the silence, the inability to look his way. cyno had taken tighnari at his word. tighnari had not honoured it by standing with him. he had expected him there. he had not been. and that glance to him in the moment, it had been a warning to say no.

tighnari's ears stand to the full of their height, before, slowly, he lowers them. they press back like two, long stalks as he considers it, his gaze unflinching in cyno's, until, finally, he allows himself to nod. the gesture takes strength. he breathes in. ]

You're right. I unthinkingly broke my word. I left you alone tonight when I said I would not. I acknowledge that I was wrong, and I apologise. [ clear, and bloodless: ] You have been wronged.

[cashewlater]

[ tighnari apologizes, and cyno.. does not know what to do with it, at first. he had expected more conflict, but tighnari nods, his ears lying flat, and cyno feels the anger and irritation flood out of him like sails losing their wind. he deflates, his gaze flickering low, pale lashes kissing his cheeks. ]

No, I -

[ cyno's jaw sets. he's searching for the right words, the proper way to string them together, but navigating interpersonal relationships has always been difficult, for cyno. ]

I'm being unreasonable. [ he dips his head. ] This behavior is unbecoming of a Matra.

[citer]

You are being unreasonable. Not for a Matra - for you. [ equally bloodless. tighnari looks at cyno, and he thinks - he doesn't know this cyno. the one that holds accountability not in words, but in avoidance. not the one with rules on number of hours spent apart. this one, the cold weight in him says, this ones makes him fear.

tighnari wishes he can say that fear has never stopped him from speaking his mind. but that, too, is unreasonable, even for him. ]

I had not expected that you would think of the freedom I have right now is from you.

[cashewlater]

[ cold shame rolls over him like a stinging fog, and cyno's hands ball into fists at his side. perhaps he should have taken tighnari's suggestion and spoken about this later, once his mind came back to him, but that is simply another error on his part, borne from lack of past friendships to guide him. ]

Please, forgive me.

[ cyno may not be good with interpersonal relationships, but he is exceptionally good at reading people, and after knowing tighnari for months now, he can sense that fear as easily as he would read pages on a book. for tighnari to feel fear of any kind around him.. the idea alone makes his stomach twist painfully. ]

I had preconceptions about how this night would be, I should not have placed them on your shoulders. You're free to spend your time however you wish.

[citer]

No. I gave you my word, and I should have honoured it. I should not give you my word when I can't do so.

[ tighnari looks at him. ] What am I to forgive you for? For voicing that my freedom is a gift? Cyno, [ bleakly: ] gifts can be taken away.

[cashewlater]

I had not meant to imply that. Tighnari, I -

[ his expression sets, and for a moment cyno's gaze is distant, as if he's caught up in other thoughts, looking somewhere that is not here. the subject of tighnari's freedom is complicated at best, and there are many moving parts involved in cyno's work right now. ]

Your freedom should not be a gift, it should be a right. [ and cyno should never infringe upon it - and for such petty reasons. ] Though I know it is not that simple.

[citer]

It isn't. [ he agrees. his tail is a still thing behind him. the chill of the night air is impermeable.

cyno looks past him, and tighnari's mouth shuts. ] What are you thinking?

[cashewlater]

[ cyno breathes deeply, speaks calmly. ] Do you hear anyone near? [ his gaze meets tighnari's again, his expression smooth and even. this is not a safe topic to discuss, openly. cyno's ears are keen, and he's heard no sign of anyone approaching, but tighnari's ears are better still. ]

[citer]

[ tighnari's ears flinch. he listens for a moment, the cold weight like ice - and then, slowly, shakes his head. ]

No. But I will admit to not having been paying attention for the last several minutes. [ it's irrational, but the fear consolidates. azar, he thinks, bleak. ] I would like to leave, now.

[cashewlater]

[ cyno nods. ] Home? [ or back to the gala? ]

[citer]

Anywhere but here.

[ the moment he voices it, tighnari knows it to be true. his ears set, resolute - and without warning, he turns, and begins to walk. he knows these gardens well. the trellis are only for decoration - he grips the fencing interlinked behind it, gauges the distance between it and the wall, and vaults himself over it effortlessly. ]

This way.

[cashewlater]

[ ah, there's something about the way that tighnari lunges over the fence in all of his finery that steals cyno's heart away. he's not in a chuckling mood, but if he were, he'd surely be smiling.

nevertheless, cyno follows suit, scaling the fencing and leaping over it, following behind tighnari on quiet feet. ]

[citer]

[ tighnari's steps take them across garden walkways and low walls until they emerge out onto the divine tree. its great trunks span out before him as he slides down to a lower branch, and then, gauging the distance between himself and a looping walkway, he descends down to it with the flutter of something winged.

tighnari breathes. away from the akademiya, even the air seems sweeter for it. he looks back. ]

Ah. Better.

[cashewlater]

[ they move quickly and quietly onto the boughs of the divine tree, scaling thick, sturdy branches until tighnari deigns their spot safe. they'll be missed at the gala, surely, most especially by azar, whose eyes follow them everywhere, but there is plenty of time left in the night.

cyno inhales deeply. there is quiet all around them, save for the chirp and buzz of night insects, and the wind in the leaves of the divine tree. ]

There is a reason I wanted this night to be.. special.

[citer]

[ tighnari stills. ]

More special than it has already been? [ dry, but there's something like weariness there, brimming. he allows cyno to approach. ] Why?

[cashewlater]

[ cyno's expression flickers with shame once more, but he keeps his counsel, and instead draws into momentary silence, thinking. ]

I'm likely to be gone for a good while, soon. I've stumbled into something complicated.

[citer]

... regarding your current case?

[cashewlater]

No. I was reviewing some unrelated data, and I found a suspicious amount had been erased. When I looked more deeply into it, it soon became clear that too much was being hidden from my eyes to be considered anything less than suspicious.

[ another deep inhale, and cyno's eyes catch tighnari's. there is trust, here. ]

My audit request was immediately rejected, and the Grand Sage has blocked any and all attempts for me to investigate further.

"The power of the General Mahamatra is granted by the sages. You have no right to judge us."

[citer]

[ tighnari's blood runs cold. azar had sought them out, he knows. his gaze had lingered. he had thought it was simply because of his presence at a public function; it had been, in fact, worse. cyno had shown his face despite knowing the outcome of his audit requests and who had blocked them. he is, in fact, the most reckless man in sumeru.

tighnari breathes in. he puts aside his fear. he puts aside the matter of his freedom. he puts aside that seven-year-old valuka shuna still sitting there in the sanctuary of surasthana, his neck chained to the wall. what is the next step? what are the implications? what does this mean for survival? ]

Have me come with you on your investigation.

[cashewlater]

Tighnari -

[ it's clear that cyno means to argue, for thoughts of his safety climb immediately to the forefront of cyno's thoughts. but.. would tighnari be safe here, left behind in a palace, without cyno to protect him, should something go wrong? tighnari is sharp and rich in wit, strong now with his bow and his concoctions, but..

no. what cyno thinks doesn't matter. this is about personal freedom. if tighnari wants to do this.. who is cyno to deny him? he exhales slowly. ]

All right. It will not be easy, I will be more or less in exile as I unravel this knot, and if things go desperately wrong in a way that I - we - cannot fix, we may very well be on the run for the rest of our lives. Or worse.

[citer]

And if I stay here, I am a walking target to stymie your investigations. Regardless of the words we have exchanged tonight, it is clear that we care for each other. Azar will use that. [ tighnari's gaze is that of flint-steel. he speaks in fact. this is what azar will do. tighnari's life had begun a mere month ago, when the doors of the sanctuary of surasthana opened and he was allowed to leave with incremental steps. azar had been there before that, and he had seen azar do so time and again.

gifts can be taken away. who was it that taught him that? it was a question not worth asking.

then, abruptly: ]

Do you know why I have never been to the city by myself, without you?

[cashewlater]

[ cyno presents no further argument, wouldn't even if tighnari weren't correct in his assumptions. in the end, tighnari will be safest by his side. ]

Why?

[citer]

Because I can't. [ flatly. ] If any of the Sages, or those working under them, were to see and recognise me, they would confiscate me and send me back to you like contraband - or worse. There is nowhere in this world where a Valuka Shuna can live. There are only two people on Teyvat who believes in my right to freedom - myself, and you. Which is an improvement, considering that as of a month ago, I was the only one.

I don't fear exile, and I won't be useless to you. You know that. I'd rather my fate bound to yours and have control over keeping you out of trouble, than to be bound to you all the same, but far away, and with no ability to help. Cyno, can you accept this?

[cashewlater]

[ cyno's heart feels heavy. what tighnari says makes painful sense, and while he cannot and never will be understand tighnari's plight personally, he nevertheless understands what it feels like to be used as a token. to be seen as an object. how foolish he had been, to think that he could offer tighnari real freedom, while things remain as they are. there is much to change. work to be done. ]

Yes.

[ a simple answer, given in faith. ]

I had planned to leave by week's end, but perhaps sooner might be prudent. I don't expect Azar will make any move against me, in his arrogance he believes me cowed, but it is only a matter of time before things tilt out of my favor.